“Awakening and owning the dreams that God has placed in our hearts isn’t about getting stuff or attaining something. It’s about embracing who we are and who he has created us to be. In him. He is our dream come true, and the one true love of our life. But we can’t love him with our whole hearts when our hearts are asleep. To love Jesus means to risk coming awake, to risk wanting and desiring.” ― Stasi Eldredge, Becoming Myself: Embracing God’s Dream of You

A dear friend of mine asked me today what I want and how I envision my future. I answered her in part, but I’ve been thinking about it a lot and, as far as what I want goes, this is what I’ve come up with (in no particular order):

I want to make people smile and laugh. I want to bring them joy. I want to show God’s love to the unlovable. I want to comfort the brokenhearted. I want to sing again. I want to laugh over silly things. I want to visit Kevin and Jill in California. I want to go dancing. I want to keep losing weight and get fit. I want to write for a living and be a published author. I want to praise Him continually. I want to help people however I’m able. I want to embrace life in all of its messy glory. I want to make my own dresses. I want to stop being irritated by trivial things like snow and inconsiderate drivers. I want faeries to do my dishes and laundry for me while I’m sleeping. I want to spend more time with my family and friends. I want to fall in love with someone who genuinely loves me back (bonus points if he’s a musician). I want a pitbull – preferably a female so I can name her Morticia (“Tish” for short). I want to always be awed by sunsets and take delight in blowing bubbles. I want to sit outside with a cup of steaming, hot, coconut coffee and watch the sunrise with Jesus. I want to be as supportive and encouraging to others as they have been to me. I want to shine (His) Light into people’s lives. I want to feed people healthy food that tastes great. I want to spread the gospel. I want to find my Native American ancestor. I want to see countless people come to faith in Christ. I want to be seen, known, and loved for who I am. I want to feel beautiful. I want to go to Europe. I want to get better at managing my time. I want to slow-dance in the moonlight. I want to smell the ocean. I want to make people feel special. I want to be wanted. I want a huge bouquet of lilacs. I want to be there when the people I love need me. I want time to clean out/declutter my apartment. I want to walk barefoot in the grass. I want to sit around a bonfire some night with a glass of wine, singing with friends while someone accompanies us on guitar. I want to get better at being on time. I want to teach illiterate people to read. I want to learn what it means to be Native American. I want to make people feel welcome – wherever I am. I want to be a shoulder for people who need one. I want a guy who’s willing to make a fool of himself for me. I want the people I care about to be happy, healthy, and have a strong relationship with God. I want to be kissed in the rain. I want to help hurting, damaged women find healing. I want to lie on a hillside and make cloud pictures. I want to come home at night to someone I can laugh and pray with. I want to love others right where they’re at. I want to be able to give more. I want to embody the fruit of the Spirit. I want to be with someone who is as sold out to Jesus as I am. I want to be the Proverbs 31 woman. I want to make God, my parents, and my son proud of me. I want to be used to show people how valuable they are. I want Jesus to come back. I want God’s will – for all of us. I want to make a difference in someone’s life. I want to always be as thankful for my many blessings as I am right now. But what I want more than anything is simply to be the woman God created me to be.